The Marvelous Patric

 Dear blog,
School is a-going.  And i'm going with it.  Teaching has been going well.  I enjoy the supply-side of education far more than the consumption-side.  The classes they're making me take this semester don't interest me very much.  At least I have my thesis to work on to keep me sane.  I had my proposal meeting today and it went well.  I have some really great people on my committee and I'm really excited about where this play is going.  

Meanwhile, I still make comics.  After I get done with this FNS story, I'll stop and come back in 2010 with FNS in black and white again.  I've decided that the color is cool, but it's slowing me down.  I'll just do it for special stories I think.  Fun Factory continues to be a blast, but each strip takes me like 4 hours to do.  Urg.  The better I get, the slower I get.  I do think that Fun Factory is a better strip than FNS right now just because I've been holding in all these ideas for so long that they're pretty refined.  On the other hand, Freaks N Squeeks looks prettier and it really has some well-defined characters in it.  I don't have to "write" FNS so much as "watch" what the characters do.  

In personal news, April 16, 2011 looks like a pretty important day in my life.  Just saying.  Looks like a game changer and all.  An expensive game changer.  
Band sucks these days.  The fucktards on the band board fired Glen, the awesome director.  There was a loud complaint about this by a good portion of the membership that was essentially ignored.  I swear, if I hear the phrase, "we're getting back to how it used to be" one more time at practice, I'll scream.  Things look grim there.  I'm not sure how much longer I'll be with that band.  Tiffany already left and it just doesn't feel fun any more.  Why should I stay with a group that doesn't want me?

Current Location: office
Current Music: Portions for Foxes - Rilo Kiley

dear blog,

it is finals!  I have just uploaded and printed the first draft of my play.  this summer, i will write a second draft that will be completely different.  meanwhile, last week i was in ohio for a goddaughter's first communion.  this weekend, i will be in chicago for a nephew's first communion.  oh, and it's finals, remember?  I actually only have 1 twenty page paper (double spaced, luckily) left to write about tom sawyer and comparative mythology.  yeah.  i can do that.  but, there's a lot riding on it.  not only my grade, but if i do a good enough job on it, i may get a teaching assistantship next year.  yeah, no pressure.  

matt and i have started podcasting together.  this grew out of my weekly live drawing session on ustream.  i like having someone to banter with, and i liked recording it for people who missed it.  i realized that when i watch other ustreams of cartoonists, i really just listen to them, so i thought really i wanted a podcast.  you can find all this stuff at fns.  

i haven't drawn my comic for over a week.  i was always going to take this week off, but then last week, i got massively sick.  I've been sick a lot this year.  I'll be happy when summer comes and burns all the diseases away, as is my understanding of medical science.  

things are progressing nicely with the girlfriend.  the most common question we / i get is "when are you getting engaged?"  all i'm gonna say is that I know the answer to the question, but i'm not saying.  

today, is the performance of the dramatic reading i'm in!  i'm excited!  and dressed in black!  and my hair is combed nicely.  the things i do for art.  i think it's gonna go well.  i hope people come.  i really love acting.  i missed it so much.  i found out from a friend that next year GREAT theater is doing both wonka and the producers.  I loved being wonka and it's been my lifelong dream (well, as long as it was possible) to be Leo Bloom in the producers.  I have contacted the guy in charge and I'm so gonna audition for both plays.  I wanna be a producer....

Current Location: home
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Jack Killed Mom - Jenny Lewis

dear blog,

the year of the patric is almost over. i'm not going to do a year-in-review post like everyone else. that is just soooooo 2007.

so what is new with patric? well, i finally got a diagnosis on my terrible head pain. i have atypical facial neuralgia. with a diagnosis with that many big words, you'd probably think i'm dying. but, i'm not. actually, it's quite treatable with medicine. for like the rest of my life. but, it could be worse.

i've been playing my bass at my new church. i haven't played very much, but it's been a lot of fun. i wish i was better, but considering i haven't really played my bass in years and never played in a group before, i think it's going fairly well.

band is also going fairly well. we're on break now until the 5th.

my first semester of grad school is also over. i assume i did fairly well. i really don't care much about grades. it seems fairly ridiculous that i could get an A in the class i learned the most in and also get an A in the class i learned the least in. fairly arbitrary, wouldn't you say?

I really liked my Rhetoric of Style class. I think the most creative work I've written in a long time came from that class. far more creative than my actual creative writing class. I learned so much there and had so much fun.

i'm thinking of collecting all my writings from this semester into a pdf and selling it. the work would include 4 short stories and a couple of essays. i'm not sure how many pages, but at least fifty, likely more.

i ended up canning my secret project. the project was a 6 minute animated FNS holiday special. i have the voices and the artwork, but i was having trouble getting the lip-sync to work out. i decided i would rather keep it until next year. maybe i can get someone good at animating to help out. i'd also like to find some music and stuff, so i think it if i wait, it'll work out much better.

FNS is going to return next week. i'm going to devote the time i would have spent animating to drawing it. which is like, tomorrow night. but still, it's the thought that counts. oh, who am i kidding? i'm gonna waste time playing guitar hero.

i have to finish my xmas shopping tonight. i have only a couple of things left to buy.

and i get to work over break. it's "extra" money not included in my usual GA package. woos and hoos.

Current Location: the office

dear blog,

I'm at the office right now. It's quiet today. I've been working on some stuff.

The semester is winding down. I already have final projects in sight. I've picked the story to revise for my short story class. Chances are, this is the story that will be my big thesis deally. It's the most developed idea. It's about a detective in the afterlife. A neo noir story. It's weird working only in text. I'm used to being able to use things like body language to help tell a story. Comics are far more subtle, I think. When all you have to work with are words, the words have to do all the work. It's a weird little challenge.

Right now, I'm hungry for chicken. Possibly lemon-pepper.

The headache isn't too bad today. Maybe the prednasone is helping. I haven't had to take a percoset yet today. I may be able to make it all the way for the first time in a week. That would be nice. I have an MRI tomorrow at 3:55. The doctor thinks it's probably something with a nerve, since there aren't any other neurological symptoms. Unless I'm crazy.
I wonder if it's carbon monoxide. I work in a very small, poorly ventilated room with 1 to 3 other people. We all get kinda sleepy when all four of us are there. I'm tempted to bring a carbon monoxide detector to work. Except, if there is carbon monoxide, what would they do? We don't have any other workspace.

Obviously, I'm thrilled with how the election turned out. Barack Obama makes me feel like I can do anything. He makes me feel like there's no challenge we can't all overcome. I think he's right when he says to be our brother or sister's keeper. We need to look out for and help each other. That's not socialism, that's just being kind.

I'm taking a brief break from FNS until January. The big story ended on saturday and I need a break. I'm taking the time to finish other things. This week, I finally finished coloring some pages for someone else that I've had forever. Tomorrow, after homework, I'm going to work on Fun Factory and finish that up. Someone asked me what my plans for FNS were now. I laughed because I'm going back to my old way of not having any idea what I'm doing. It's going to be so unplanned and unprepared again. Back to basics and all that. I think some people were disappointed I didn't do much with the election this time around. I did make fun of McCain, so it's not like I left it completely alone. I was just much more interested in the story. Which, if I hadn't switched to a five-day schedule instead of six, would have finished before the election. The total number of strips in Sad Little Life? 338. That'll make a nice book.

Target had a huge sale on Wii games two weeks ago. Buy 2 get 1 free type sale. I now have two christmas presents for somebodies. I did claim the free one for myself, but I haven't touched it yet. I think, since Dexter (and now Dixie) usually "give me a present" for Christmas, it'll probably be that game. I really don't have time to play much right now. I played some Smash Bros for about an hour a few days ago. I'm hopelessly lost in that stupid subspace maze. I can't really remember what I was doing. I think I'm going to go back to playing Mario Kart. I still haven't played NIghts from last christmas a whole lot. Clearly, people who can buy a fifty dollar videogame per week and finish it have a.) too much time and b.) too much disposable income.

Current Location: the office

dear blog,

I'm entering the sixth week of my headache. I've decided to name it. After all, we name tropical storms. This is like a tropical storm in my head. Suggestions for names?

I have been to the doctor. There have been scans and whatnot. I shall be returning to the doctor for follow-up.

This is not a migraine. I know this because I have very effective migraine medicine that does nothing, and the migraines always hit the top of my head.

I have some new theories about my headache. I'm considering that instead of my sinuses being full, that perhaps it's that there isn't enough stuff in them. Also, what I was describing as "liquid splashing" in my ears, I believe is actually the sound of air bubbles inside my head popping. I'm also thinking that the fact I can't cry may not just be because I am super tough, but it could be a symptom.

Tomorrow is The Election. Obviously, I'm very excited. I'll be voting for my evil liberal agenda. I'm hoping we'll be able to force everyone into a gay marriage and abort their babies. Mwahahahaha! If nothing else, I'm hoping for healthcare.

School is meh-worthy. Classes are going pretty well. I have written two short stories. One of these two will be developed into a novel for my thesis work, I think.

I'm switching to a new church. Father Tom got taken out of Brennyville this summer. I tried to give the new guy, Father Tony, a shot, but I just can't stand him. He's lazy. I'm switching to St. John's in Foley. I like it a lot better there. I haven't been coming home from church angry like I was at St. Elizabeth's.

Tonight is our band concert at the Paramount. We're dong a movie themed concert. We also have band board elections. I'm running. I really want to be on the band board. After the bit of drama this summer with limiting the band, I really think it's important for a younger person to be on the board instead of the same people who have always been there.

I've been saying that 2008 is the Year of the Patric, but there's only two months left to go! I'm gonna miss 2008!!

Current Location: the office
Current Music: just the sound of the fan

dear blog,

Right now, I'm at Moorhead. I'm attending a graduate fair, representing my school. It is my job to tell people why they should pick SCSU over any other school.

I really don't know what i'm doing.

I went to SCSU because I live there. Sure, they gave me a great assistantship, so I guess I can talk about that. But, the programs? Yeah, i really don't know anything.

In other Patric news, it's Fallcon this weekend. That's like my favorite show. I love going there, it's a lot of fun. I don't expect to sell much, given the economy sucking like a blackhole.

Life is very busy. School and work take up a lot of my time. The rest goes to drawing FNS and the various house projects. The siding and roof is done, but now Rock is working on a three-season porch. I hold things. Last friday, I put a stormdoor on the front all by myself. That was interesting, but it worked out okay. It came with instructions, so I wasn't just trying to figure stuff out.

I think school is going well. I like two out of three classes. The one I don't like is terrible. It's supposed to be about technology and english, but all the material we've read (so far) is so horribly outdated. These things were written in the early 90s, predicting stuff that happened already three or more years ago. We weren't told it was an online class, but it is. And, it's using a MOO for it's online, which some may remember from, well, the early 90s. I've come to the conclusion that our teacher is at the very least incredibly lazy, if not incompetent.

The election is like a month away. As is probably obvious, I love Obama. Please vote for him. We can't take another four years of a leader who has no idea what ordinary people are going through. McCain thinks $5000 a year should be sufficient for medical costs. My mom spends more than that in just a couple months on prescriptions alone. Obama is right, we need to look out for each other. We need to be our brother's or sister's keeper. We are all in this together. We need to help each other. You want morality? Tell me, how is it moral to allow people to have to choose between medicine and food? How is it moral to give a tax break to the top 5%, and allow the poorest of the poor to loose their homes? How is it moral to say babies must be born, deny them health care and education, but then send young people to die in another country?
Voting for Obama is a moral choice. Frankly, I wouldn't vote for John McCain even if Satan himself was running against him.

Current Location: concordia college, moorhead, mn

dear blog,

it is over. the girl has left me.

it was her, not me. she couldn't work with my Catholicism against her fundamentalism. i didn't believe in the absoluteness of the bible the way she would.

sigh.

i thought things were going well. i knew religion was a sore spot, but i didn't think it was insurmountable. i thought it we wanted to, we could make it work. it wouldn't be easy, but it was doable.

the only thing i feel okay about is i know i tried. it wasn't me. i didn't fail. it just wasn't meant to be. there wasn't anything more i could do.

so now, i'm back at square one. sometimes, life gives you a ladder, sometimes it's a chute.

Current Mood: sad

dear blog,

This is a real post, unlike the last too politically-themed posts. In today's post, I'm going to actually talk about me.

Last saturday, my mom accidentally ran over my cat, Buffy. Mom felt really bad. I came home and she started to cry. She had already buried my kitty. I feel bad too, but in a way, it's like it isn't real because I wasn't there and I never saw her body. Buffy was a good cat, but afraid of everything. She never did get along with Dexter, but she liked Dixie. I feel bad, almost like I failed her. I don't know how things would have been different if I had been there. She died instantly.

A black stray cat has had kittens somewhere in or around one of my barns. There's a part of me that wants to go find a kitten and bring it in, similarly to how I got Buffy ten years ago. Another part of me realizes that isn't a good idea. I guess that's the adult part.

My mouse Ginny escaped. For the first few days, I tried to catch her, but failed. I would see her running around, but was never able to catch her. Then, her cage mate, Janis, died. I suspect she died of loneliness, as mice sometimes do. I haven't seen Ginny for a few days and think she is probably dead too. I now have no mice left.

I apparently shocked all my facebook friends the other day when I updated my relationship status to "in a relationship." It hasn't been quite a month, but it felt like it was time. I've been seeing quite a bit of the girl. I've been told by several people "don't screw it up." I'm doing my best, but I make no promises.

In my head, it's like there's this weird trade off. I traded a cat and two mice for one girlfriend. That isn't to say she is only worth one cat and two mice, but my screwed-up brain says that there has to be a balance of loss and gain, of happiness and sadness. I know this isn't true, that there isn't a cosmic scale somewhere, striving to be even. But still, I can't help but wonder why good things can't just happen, or bad things just happen, instead of good things happening at inappropriate times so that I feel happy when I should only feel sad.

dear blog,

as of tomorrow, i will be at least 20% better looking. That's right... I'm getting zapped. The "laser" will be shot directly into my "eye ball", correcting my "vision". between the eye surgery and the new car, i figure i am now 25%-30% more dateable.

in other news, mom was in the hospital again. it was really more to do with the original stuff, which they weren't quite sure what it was. they have now reached the conclusion that it was vascular, have taken steps to fix it, and she is recovering nicely.

i'm working on redesigning www.freaknsqueeks.com . i was informed, by many different people, that the site design was a huge roadblock to reading / worshipping my comic. the redesign has been going on for about a week, and at the moment, i'm just redirecting the .com to the webcomicsnation page. this is because there is all that nice code over there. i, knowing nothing about code, like the fact that they have a nice plug 'n' play system. but, there are things i wish i had control over that i don't. and, since i don't really understand the code, i really can't change a lot of stuff. my coding ability doesn't go beyond creating a link and embedding an image. and no, i'm not going to learn code. i've tried. i've failed. i'm not built that way.

i fear i may have to move fns off of wcn. which would mean moving 1200+ strips. and re-uploading / making pages for all of them. i have this fear because i'm starting to think that comicpress might be the best way to go. but, we'll see. i want to see what the new comicspace venture will offer in terms of features before i make any decisions.

i've also been drawing my new weekly comic, picture imperfect. PI is quickly becoming far more autobiographical than i thought it would be. i haven't officially announced anything, but there is a www.picture-imperfect.com now. i figure once i know what's what with wcn/comicspace, and i have more than a dozen strips up, i'll make some noise about it.

this weekend, i'm driving over to wisconsin for a one-day comic show on sunday. i really don't know what to expect, but the table is free, so i just have to pay for gas and a hotel. 10 million dollars later, we'll see what happens.

dear blog,

it's been a while since i've posted. i'm sorry. i can understand how that must frighten and confuse many a person who look to this blog as their only source of Patric-Centric information. "Is Patric okay?" these people wonder, as they lay awake at night watching roaches climb the wall. "What latest events have befallen he, whom we look to in these trying times?" (  Fear not, faithful ones, and simply read on further. )

Current Location: work
Current Mood: excited

Dear blog,

I've just wasted five minutes of my life that I regret. I looked though some of the archive of xkcd. Damn, that's a terrible comic. Really. I mean it. And it wouldn't have to be. I mean, obviously from the sketches in there, the guy could draw if he wanted to. And the ideas aren't terrible. But, the graph paper. Oh, the graph paper. It makes me feel like I'm looking at like an 8th grader's social studies notes in study hall. And the stick figures.... basically, it seems to me the guy is just lazy. there, i said it. xkcd is like a parallel-universe version of the farside, where gary larson suffered head trauma at a young age and spent his life in an institution, with nothing more than a notebook, a pencil, and some crayons for companionship. that is the nicest thing i can say about xkcd.

speaking of terrible things in webcomics, microsoft has started their own superhero webcomic. do i really need to say more about the hows and whys of that being terrible?

so, are there any webcomics that i don't hate right now? Well, Shaenon K. Garrity's new effort, Skin Horse, is teh roxors. Of course, I loved Narbonic like every other good little geek, and this continues very much in the same vein while being radically different as well. all in all, lots of fun and good stuff.

meanwhile, in other Patric news, not much going on. I finally upgraded to Leopard, which i loves. I haven't had any issues with it and it seems very solid and fast. Spaces is a very nice feature. I've also set up Time Machine, mostly for the sake of FNS. Time Machine is probably the best feature you never want to have to use.

In FNS, I've started the second act of Sad Little Life. I've been really proud of my drawing lately. I feel like I'm really hitting my stride now. I've also got two contenders for a new sunday strip that folks can vote on. The first strip, Picture Imperfect, is basically based on my and my friend Chuck when we used to work together. Or, as Chuck put it, "Dude, those may as well be still images taken from a security camera!" The second strip, Canis Domesticus, is about dogs. A lot of it is inspired by what I envision my dog Dexter would say and do.
I'm doing both strips in a style similar to FNS. As far as tone, if FNS is a middle value, I would put Picture Imperfect on the end of the meaner things FNS is, and Canis Domesticus is the nicer side. Picture Imperfect is more of a "done-in-one" strip. Canis Domesticus is more like a traditional strip in that it can be done-in-one, or it can have small short stories. Neither are story-driven like FNS is.

I'm contemplating a new journal comic. We'll see if I start it or not. If I do, it will be within the next couple of days. But, it would be vastly different from my last journal comic, and most journal comics in general. I've been inspired by something Gary Larson wrote, if that gives any hints.

Patric out.

Current Location: work
Current Music: "You don't know what love is" - The White Stripes.

dear blog,

It's 2008! So far, I'm not noticing a huge difference between 2008 and 2007. My Old Year's Resolution that I made in October was to join a gym and to get in (better) shape. Since then, I have lost a little over 20 pounds. While that's awesome, the better news is that I've lost like 3 inches at my waste and gained almost two inches in my arms. I think I prefer measuring my progress in inches, rather than pounds if for no other reason than muscle weighs more than fat. In my head, those 20 pounds I've lost also means that I've gained some pounds of muscle. Which means it's hard to figure out how much I've really lost, in a bizarre neurotic sort of way. Inches? That is far easier to see. An inch of muscle is the same as an inch of fat.

On the comic front, I'm noticing that I'm not feeling nearly as burned out as I was a few months ago. I'm still not pushing anything, though. I'm going to try out 6 strips (each) of two new comics in the next couple of weeks. This is during the Act One Intermission in FNS, so I won't be putting a strain on myself to do more comics than I would normally do. My goal is to add a strip that only updates Sundays. That would mean I have a new comic every day. However, at least psychologically, strips are easier to do than pages.

In other parts of my life, I guess I'm maintaining the status quo. I'm not too thrilled with that. I think I may have to quit band for a while. Both of them. Basically, I have to work every night (except saturday and sunday) until 8:00 pm. Municipal Band has practice at 7:30 monday nights, Sports Band is tuesdays at 7:00. If I leave work early, say 7ish both nights, I feel terrible. On one hand, I feel guilty about leaving work. On the other, on tuesdays especially, I'm usually late to band practice, so I feel guilty about that. Right now, I feel like whatever I do, I'm going to let someone down. It would probably be better for me not to be in band where a large group of people are depending on me to show up. And, even if I make practices, this is the season where the Municipal Band starts doing concerts at nursing homes, which usually start like 7:15ish. Not to mention I hardly ever make it to Sports Band performances on Saturday afternoons, when I'm (you guessed it) working.

This is, as the kids say, a suck.

It's basically impossible to change my work schedule without getting a new job. If they were to hire someone else here, then I wouldn't have enough hours to stay. I think this basically means, as much as I like my job, I have to leave. And I need to do it soon.

Oh, and my mice have stopped dying for the most part. I've got some new ones that are doing well. One died the other day, but it wasn't the respiratory infection that killed the others. She was literally just running around the cage, stopped, walked like she was drunk for a few steps and fell over. I'm guessing heart attack. For those of you keeping track, I'm on my 4th Ginny, 7th Janis, and 2nd Janie. The one that just died was the 1st Brittney.

Current Location: work
Current Mood: discontent
Current Music: I Will Survive - Cake (on XM)

dear blog,

it's been a while since i posted, so i reckon i should. let's see... what's going down....

last night the sports band was in a winter parade. it was so cold the valves froze on all the brass and most of the band ended up just singing. only the bari saxes and tubas were able to play, along with percussion. it was damn cold. after that, we had a potluck and partied till midnight or later. i say "or later" because i left at midnight. i was tired.

i really like the new speed racer trailer. i think it's pretty. i never really watched speed racer, but i think, from what i've seen, that the film has a beautiful design to it. i really love the colors.

i hate it when customers come in, pick up their order, pay, and leave all WHILE TALKING ON THEIR CELL PHONE!! Finish your damn conversation then come in. Talk to me, don't just whisper and point!

I enjoyed "Bender's Big Score." I actually didn't notice the episode breaks all that much. I felt it flowed nicely and I laughed when I watched it. While it certainly wasn't the _greatest_ Futurama ever, it was by no means the worst either. I wish there was more Brannigan, but who doesn't?

I've been playing Guitar Hero III pretty much exclusively since it came out. I'm about half-way through on "hard" now, having never played a GH game before (aside from a few minutes in stores). i like to play online too, but i almost always lose.

over the past two and a half weeks, i've had six mice die. it all started when janis (iii) died. that wasn't too big of a deal. then, ginny (i) died. she was the only original mouse left. so, i went and bought three new mice, dixie (ii), janis (iv), and ginny (ii). both janis and ginny died within a couple of days. they were replaced, thanks to petco's 15 day guarantee. the next janis died too, but was torn apart by the other mice, so who can say if it was the respitory infection the others had. i replaced janis and got a fifth mouse, brittany. brittany got sick pretty much immediately, but by this point, i had recognized the respiratory infection and isolated her. she died, and has been replaced. as of right now, all five mice seem to be doing well, though janie (the oldest) seems to enjoy hazing the newest mice.
i also bought more tubing and rearranged the cages for easier access. it was becoming a hassle to take things apart to get to the cage on the bottom to retrieve sick/dead mice.

we've actually gotten some snow lately, with more on the way. thus, i've been tractoring. i've had to clean my driveway now a total of four times, and i think i'm getting better.

on the comic front, i continue Freaks N Squeeks. i think it's going well. i'm nearly finished with what would be the first act of my big story. Jive has made his appearance, which i've been excited about for quite some time. i knew it was coming and i could hardly wait for it. there's just something about where Jive ended up that i found very interesting. it feels natural, given what we've seen from Jive and given what we've learned about him in this story so far. i have this goal that the first act will finish by the new year, or possibly Christmas. As i don't have this all scripted out, but more or less just outlined, I can't pin an exact date yet. but, i think when i finish the act, i'll take a week off. i think we need an act break, but that might just be me.

Current Location: work
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: various xmas songs